August 17, 2002
Banana Snake Island Hash
Hare: Gilligan
Hounds: Areola Boobialis, Big Bloody Ketchup, Buttcrack, Chris from Australia, Cockpit, Crotchduster, Dingoberry, Doris, Flash, F*ckin' Goofy, Hog Balls, Hoosier Daddy, Indiana Jerk Off, Just Carlos, Just Courtney, Just Puke, Just Rico, Just Rob, Just Thomas, Kojak, Lollipop, Moaner Boner, Momma, Mud Packer, Mullet, No Blow, Poop Deck, Rambo, Richard Pierce, Salad Shooter, Semper F*ck My Pie, Sir Flatulot, Slow Poker, Snatch Wax, Urine Trouble, Waayyy Beyond Gay
Anxious hounds gathered in the parking lot of Boondock's waiting for Cockpit and Crotchduster to arrive. When they finally did, there was much rejoicing. "Hooray! The coolest hashers ever are here!" All of the "new" DBH3ers were in awe, "Wow, they really are cool!" Okay, back to reality.
Everyone was busy covering themselves with a protective coating of a lethal combination of mosquito repellent, sunscreen and more mosquito repellent (hoping that it would also work as banana snake repellent). A brief and illegible chalk talk left the virgins thoroughly confused, then we all piled our happy asses into the back of 3 pickup trucks and drove to the boat ramp to catch the ferry to the island. Indiana Jerk Off and Just Rob generously donated the use of their boats for the day. Thanks guys!
Areola Boobialis, Moaner Boner and Cockpit decided to stay in the boat with Just Rob and his friends to "help navigate." We listened to a little Jimmy Buffet and pretended our Red Dogs were boat drinks. The rest of the pack was released into the shiggy that Gilligan had promised. Apparently Gilligan was dropped off at the wrong place so he had to improvise a little with the FRBs in hot pursuit right on his tail (Buttcrack eventually caught him and helped him lay the last bit of trail). The smart people on the boat kept driving by taunting the water-logged hounds as they made their way through the shoe-sucking muck, several water crossings, clam beds, some man-eating plants.
Hashers finally emerged from the marsh, looking a little disheveled. Many of them were cursing Gilligan, some were nursing wounds, a few were showing off the treasures they had found on trail, while those who had stayed on the boat looked as fresh as daisies. The found treasures included a couple of big-ass crabs that were being worn as hats, and a shoe on a rope that Momma was wearing as a bracelet. Nice! Everybody piled their not-so-happy-anymore-asses into the boats for the ride to the end. Once again, "somebody" could not find the right place so he improvised.
Circle: Way too many down-downs to remember, so here's some highlights:
When visitors were called into the circle, Just Puke asked if he was still considered a visitor and was told, "if you didn't register as DBH3, then you're a visitor!" Gilligan was called into the circle to drink for false advertising since there were no banana snake sightings. There were reports of a few trouser snake sightings, though. The boat hashers drank and Rambo had to drink for having a boat in his shorts (?!?) Cockpit and Crotchduster were accused of being way too long between hashes. Just Carlos was called in for forgetting his hash name! Apparently, he hashed with DBH3 several years ago, but can't remember his name. Yeah, right! Stick with that story, Carlos! Indiana Jerk Off finally received his Fair Share Hare apron that No Blow had made 2 years ago! Yada, yada, yada, blah, blah, blah.
Last order of business was to name Just Thomas. After discovering that he's a plumber, we came up with some "shitty" names that seem to have escaped my memory. We tossed a few ideas around, but settled on "Snake My Hole."
Back to Boondock's for some grub and cheap beer, then on to Sir Fat's Pleasure Palace for even cheaper beer. Things start to get a little foggy from here..
I was naked when I wrote this.
-Cockpit
Last modified: Saturday, 2009-May-02 08:44:27 PM CDT
